slimmeroo:

sometimes it feels like in the venn diagram of “people i am attracted to” vs “people who are attracted to me” the circles don’t touch

wolfcifer:

You’re walking in the woods

There’s no one around and your phone is dead

Out of the corner of your eye you spot him:

gay opera dubstep vampire

I just stormed an enemy base with a small army supported by a giant bird-headed monster while meteors rained down from the heavens and undead soldiers clawed their way out of the ground to join the ranks of my host.

Fucking glorious.